Whenever you submit a piece of writing, there’s often the requirement to ‘tell us a bit about yourself’.
Where does one start: reformed gambler, all-round lunatic and ragester; or mother of two, English tutor, likes tweed? Then there’s someone who was pulled over by the police at 4 a.m. on the M4 doing in excess of a ton, pulled out of a hedge by rozzers in N4 for brawling – let go with a warning, or the person who skid landed at the feet of two bobbies on the beat on the Isle of Dogs, when my bolting steed came down.
Which version of the self do people want?
This morning it’s: a 45 year old who likes passion fruit and hasn’t washed her hair since Saturday.