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It’s the flat kids, but not as we know it…

Our Ladies Day at Epsom featured countless zebras, but none in the paddock, various stilt walkers, golden fauns, swing singers, plus pink feathers and pizzas.

We were coralled on the top of a very hot hill and therefore entirely at the mercy of the sideshows, the feather ticklers and the water-sellers: that’ll be two quid please.

The best result was finding a free car-park, in the middle of a travellers’ encampment. It was hard by the £25 version. When we came back to get the car there was some kind of really serious coin tossing game going on. A showman in the middle of an enraptured circle of shirtless men was offering a 20 note if…

I would liked to have stayed to find out if? but I erred on the side of caution for this occasion. Maybe next time, with a picnic.